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We Have No Problems

You think you have problems??  Ok, put ‘em on the table.  Whaddya got?  A teenager who keeps staying out after his curfew?  A 2-year old that won’t sleep through the night?  Jeans that won’t fit? A credit card company that lowered your available credit and raised your interest rate?

Or, maybe like this Zen Mama Wannabe, you find yourself having to move – in a week!  AGH!  We wanted needed to move – so that is a good thing – but everyone who has ever moved (especially recently so that some of the horror is still in your short-term memory) knows that moving sucks.  You always have more than you think.  You always start off trying to be so organized, and by the end you are just throwing things in boxes telling yourself you will sort it out when you get there.

Maybe on top of that you find yourself caught up in all the birthday party planning for your Little One – and all the things you need to get done before her marvelous soiree can happen.  Maybe the night before her party you find yourself at the ER with your 80+ year old mother who has fallen and apparently broken her wrist (yes, on the hand she uses all time) and you are wondering how you are going to get everything ready for the birthday party tomorrow AND tend to your mother. And how in the world is your mom going to get herself dressed and take care of all her daily necessities with only one hand.

All these are problems – yes.  But not really.   Problems are what actor Liam Neeson has right now, after the tragic death of his wife Natasha Richardson.  Problems are what their two young teenage boys have upon suddenly losing their mother like that.  As I read about the story in shock and disbelief, my husband shudders too and reminds me, “We have no problems.”

We might have difficulties or inconveniences or stressors – but we are all alive.  We are healthy (knocking on wood here); our children are doing well, we are able to put food on the table…what else is there, really??

A broken wrist is a big pain in the you-know-what.  We spent nearly 4 hours at the ER tonight – 90 percent of that was waiting (waiting to be seen, waiting to be looked at, waiting to have tests done, waiting to talk to a doctor, waiting for treatment and then discharge papers). A whole lot of waiting when we wished we could be someplace else.

A broken right wrist means getting dressed by yourself becomes problematic.  Just like eating and brushing your teeth, washing your face, tearing off the toilet paper, etc.  But thank goodness when they called me to say my mom had fallen, it was to say it looked like she broke her hand and needed to go to the hospital.  Thank goodness she didn’t hit her head or break her hip, etc.

Of course, what did she do right after she had injured herself?  She went back to her room (just like Natasha Richardson did) to rest and put some ice on it.  She would have told you she was fine and would have turned down any request to have a medical professional look at it too (just like Ms. Richardson did).  It is so easy to do.  To not want to make a big deal over things.  To say, “I’m fine – really” when that is not the case.  (That certainly has been a wake-up call for me).

Problems are wondering if the MRI will show what the doctors are hoping for your sake they won’t see.  Problems are not that your colorist has gone off to India to “find herself” and you have got outgrowth to put Madonna to shame.  Problems are wondering how you are going to buy groceries this week because you’ve already used up your entire paycheck paying the bills.  Problems are not that you can’t get a reservation at the hip new restaurant in town and where the heck are you going to go to dinner on Saturday night.

Tragedies are so hard to make sense of, so hard to comprehend.  But if we do nothing else, why not use them as reminders of what is really important…your health, your loved ones, being able to financially make ends meet.  It really can put life in perspective for you – if you let it.

We have no problems, my husband reminds me, as I get caught up with all my woe-is-me details of our crazy, frantic, particularly-stressful right now life.  Repeat after me…

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2 Responses to “We Have No Problems”

  1. LarkLady Says:
    March 23rd, 2009 at 10:15 am

    Some good reminders about perspective here — the hassles of moving are mighty, but they’re hassles, not problems. A broken wrist is certainly no fun, especially when it’s the major arm (I’m only a little ambidextrous, and there are things I just can’t do with my left hand — so I really feel for your mom!), but a broken hip or a smashed head would have been so much worse!

    Hope the party for your Little One was lots of fun — and that you were able to enjoy it too, not just breathe a sigh of relief that it’s over.

  2. callieandbatido Says:
    March 24th, 2009 at 6:33 pm

    It really is all perspective, isn’t it? Moving is a hassle not a major problem. But moving in a week while trying to take care of an aging mother who has been injured, pack, plan and host a birthday party….sounds pretty overwhelming to me.

    But as you say, just being healthy and even alive are things we need to remember to be so thankful for. It helps remind us of what is really important….ah, we are back at perspective. You are so right Zen Mama.

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